Not to brag, but I did not rake my leaves this fall.

I was just waiting for that perfect opportunity, and I hope it has not yet passed.

A lot of you think it was last week. I’m banking it will come later this year.

Winter has made a couple threats this year, but it hasn’t quite arrived. Last week, we all witnessed the people that want to let you know what they were able to do this late in December.

Saturday, I drove past a golf course. There was a group of golfers on a green, and they were waving at the cars going by. They were the crazy guys who golfed on Dec. 12, 2020! I can assure you people, they were also freezing their backsides off. While the unofficial temperature in my minivan did tell me it hit 50 degrees last week, by Saturday, it was back to 30 degrees. When I was young and foolish – as opposed to being kind of old and foolish – I went on a trip with some gentleman to golf. It was spring, and we decided to drive until the weather was nice enough. We got about two-thirds of the way through Illinois and stoped for the night. I was a 50 degree evening. Escaping the Wisconsin winter, it felt like Florida. Unfortunately, when we got up in the morning, there was two inches of snow and the mercury had dived 30 degrees.

We kept driving and found a course open about an hour south of there, though we were the only ones dump enough to be on it.

That’s how I know these guys showing off that they were golfing on Dec. 12 were couldn’t actually wait until they were able to get near the fireplace.

Friday afternoon, there were people out and about on motorcycles. “Can’t believe I get to take this for a ride on Dec. 11!” the rider next to me in the grocery store parking lot said.

“Aren’t you cold?” I asked.

“Kind of, but when you can ride, you ride.”

Can’t beat that logic, but I’ll admit that I warmed my vehicle up for 10 minutes for the errand I was running.

I think it was then that it hit me: I’m outdoing all these people.

You golfed in December? That’s nothing: I have yet to put away my lawn furniture. Yup, I’m that guy. My December, getting ready to lounge outside.

And those leaves? I may keep waiting to rake them. I may wait until I can see if I can be the guy who did yardwork in January…Or, better yet, maybe not at all!

I once had a neighbor who mowed his lawn on Dec. 7, just to say he did it. That’s stupid, isn’t it. The grass isn’t still growing. At least do something cool. Bungee jump off your roof. I shut down the mowing operations sometime in September. OK, August.

I’m that guy!

McLoone